New Script (Originally from Joe Panton)

(Underlined parts I've changed)

Script – 

• Camera
• Stage directions

Premise: A drug dealer who had built his business to be worth millions tries to escape his past and lead a normal life whilst an ambitious professional hitman is hired onto his tail and a cat and mouse chase across England ensues.

The time and date appears, the whole film's story is told at different times, 

Spring electrical (an electrical wholesaler/ lighting-shop) – Mid-afternoon

It’s mid-afternoon about 4:00pm with heavy rain outside, inside the ironically-bleakly-lit-room of a lighting-shop. The lighting shop is situated next to a bustling bypass road/ dual carriageway, allowing for new customers and visitors at any time, each visitor has a story of where they've come from and where they're going. The shop starts nearly empty, with the exception of the much organised and very experienced sales assistant/ cashier behind the till who, at the time, is having a conversation with her also present mother, and a a young man with sunglasses and a black tie suit on examining the products in the display room, which isn't visible for the entirety of the film.

[Camera starts with a shot of the window on the right side of the door, from the right side of display shelves, showing the grim and rainy sky and the busy bypass road, slowly the camera starts to move backwards through the shop as a dolly shot from a one point perspective] 

Voiceover of man: If you look at me – in all my riches, and you told me that what you saw was an innocent man who got lucky, I’m not proud - but you’d be wrong. 

(Background conversation)

Sales assistant: - Oh! Mum, do you not want a bag? 

Customer/mother: Oh no thank you love, that’s fine, I’m rushing home to escape the rain, are you all coming for lunch on Sunday? 

Sales assistant: It doesn’t look as if it’s about to get any brighter does it! Yeah, yeah we should be there about 2-ish? Thanks mum, see you. 

Customer/mother: See you soon, love.

(Customer takes product and walks down the right aisle and out of the shop, walking past the camera)

 [Camera has made it across the right aisle and to the end of the shelves, and dollies over to the left side of the shelves, facing across the left aisle to the window now to the left side of the door, in a one point perspective shot again]

 Voiceover of man: All that I built is now crumbling, and I turn away without looking back. 

(Hitman walks into the main area from the display room and kneels onto the floor to examine products enthusiastically)

Voiceover of man: But others can’t… and they won’t. 

Sales assistant: (Shifting her attention to young man leant down) Can I help you sir? 

Hitman: [the camera switches to behind mysterious suited man shoulder, showing the sales assistant for the first time] (He turns to assistant and nods his head) actually you can! (Gets up and starts walking slowly towards counter) Bit of a weird thing to ask actually but (smiles sisterly and lays hand onto till, [a medium two shot taken from one side of the till, showing the pair on the opposite sides] could you just tell me what you know about this man. (Throws photograph onto till, picture looks torn and beaten up )

Shop assistant: (Looks down, shaking her head, gulping) I’m sorry but I don’t think I can give out that information, why?

Mysterious mans facial expression changes to anger.

Hitman: (Pulls gun from waistband – back of jeans - raises gun level to her head) [Music starts]

Shop assistant: Oh… I don’t... h- he came in earlier – this morning. H-he knows our boss - my boss, his name – I think the name is Tom Longley, please don’t – 

Hitman: (Puts photograph back into pocket and lowers gun to the base of the till) Where can I find your boss?

Shop assistant: (Eyes shut just wanting the experience to be over) He lives in Ashtead… Overdale… please don-

Hitman: And his name? 

Shop assistant: … 

Hitman: (Raises gun again) 

Shop assistant: It’s Brian Greene! OK!!! Please just leave!!!

[Screen turns to black promptly and a second later a gunshot is heard, followed by a stumbling onto the floor, before jumping to a medium shot of the teenager, taken from behind the till, with the hitman obscuring the view of a 4^th character who witnessed the act in the background]

Hitman: (Lowers gun and sighs deeply before slowly turning around, we see the other customer standing limply in shock, and the hitman raises his gun once more) [The screen blackens before the title of film fades in the color of blood red]